Entertainment for one

I jumped in my car in a rush to get to work and DID NOT NOTICE that the neighbor's little dog…I don't know what you'd call it….looks like a hairy doorknob and not much bigger…pushed-in face and under bite...had jumped in my car right when I opened the door. It cowered on the passenger front floor, unseen by me. When I started up the engine, it jumped up in my lap, but I didn't know what it was, it seemed like all of a sudden my crotch came alive with a wild and hairy life of its own. I hit my head on the ceiling and pelvic-bounced the dog onto the car horn which freaked him out as he bounded, vomiting mid-air into the back seat.

Last year I was, once again, racing to get to work on time and I pulled my coat off the hanger in the hall closet, threw it on and raced out the door. I had recently bought a new car which I loved, but the reviews of it said the seats were not all that comfortable. I thought they were. So here I am driving to work and feeling like the back of the seat isn't so comfortable after all. This gets me to wondering if it was the power of suggestion that is making me feel uncomfortable in the seat, but then I think, nah, I'm not that suggestible…am I? Then I'm thinking that my coat isn't that comfortable in this seat, so maybe the way the seat curves is making the coat tight on me, or maybe the seat belt is ratcheted too tight. Anyway, I get to the office parking lot still with this head full of weighty what-if scenarios. I get in the elevator, which is mirrored all around and notice that my left shoulder is three inches higher than my right shoulder because the wire hanger is still inside my jacket.